Rachel Maddow, Lawrence O'Donnell, and Al Sharpton are at the White House talking tax rates. A new low for our president; taking policy advice from those cunts.

My theory is all but law: people are fucking stupid.

If you're voting for Obama because Biden is on the ticket...I don't even have a zinger for that...you're just a fucking idiot.

David Letterman + Rachel Maddow. Sounds like the start of a lesbian porno, right? The real question is, who wears the strap-on?

Oh, Lawrence O'Donnell, I'll take a shot. I'll punch you right in the vagina.

An apple bumper sticker above a marriage equality (or whatever the hell the blue and yellow "=" is) bumper sticker. So telling.

If you don't like cilantro in your rice, don't come to Chipotle and order rice without cilantro. That shit's amazing, and you slow down the line by being picky.

Hot air balloons are gay.

Fat people are not handicapped. Therefore, their parking stalls should be the ones furthest away from the door. Especially at Wal-Mart.

I just watched a clip of Lawrence O'Donnell. Now I know what a blood-belching vagina sounds like.

Okay, bitch. Don't get all pissy with me because I'm trying to get something figured out at customer service, and you just want to go through here to check out.

Fat people who think their alleged sense of humor compensates for their lack of willpower annoy the shit out of me.

Golf: the douche bag hobby.

If you let your 10-year-old son dress like a thug, don't be one of these crying bitches all over the news in a few years that is so shocked that he became one.

Dumb ass question of the day: (At Subway) "Does the bacon lettuce tomato sandwich have bacon on it?"

If you're a man with gray hair and still sport an ear ring, news flash: get the fuck over it. You're not hip, and you probably never were.

Who the fuck cares about Obama's bracket?

Sandra Fluke isn't a slut. Sluts are generally hot. Sandra Fluke is a robot.

I fucking hate LMFAO.

Am I the only one who upon seeing a bicycler on a heavily travelled street wants to shout, "I don't see a tag on that thing, fag! Get the fuck off my street!"